Sunday, June 29, 2008

Weekly / Weakly

Dear friends, I never intended to be such a weak / weekly blogger! I had been encouraged to start blogging awhile before I actually bit the bullet and .... let another Sarah friend set one up for me. In pre-blogging days I constantly had thoughts of things to blog about. Daily happenings, cute kid stuff, various (and trust me there are many) personal idiosyncrasies.
I love to check on my friends daily and catch a quick glimpse of where they find themselves on a day to day basis. But, as I am sure some have noticed, here I find myself 6 days out from my last post! What in the world!!
Maybe today's post should be about the various and sundry "Blogging Blockers".
So far I have not learned the art of "speed posting". I find it takes a lot longer than I anticipate to compose and publish a post.

Okay, total epiphany: maybe it takes so long because I write too much, and maybe I write too much, because I THINK too much!

Well dear ones, I planned to leave you all with a bullet point list of all that is going on in my life and how it they keep me too busy to post, but this is instead what you are going to get. NONE of my premeditated rambling!
2 prayer requests:
~Marlene stepped on a nail last night, and will be getting a tetanus shot tomorrow
~My precious friend and sister-in-law Wendi is going to have a DNC tomorrow to remove what remains in her womb of the most recent addition to our family. This little one rests now in the arms of Jesus. We so wish this were not the case, but we continue to trust even as we grieve.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Queen For The Day

Our dear Marlene turned 8 yesterday. She was not born until after 11:30 PM Eastern Daylight Savings Time, so we kept saying all day,"You're not 8 yet!" In fact she was not "officialy" 8 until after we were all asleep last night.

Marlene had the priviledge of doing her own shopping for her birthday gift from
Grandma Mc. She was thrilled to buy a small camera, purse, bike helmet and knee pads. We always do donuts for birthday breakfast, so after she got up and dressed she grabbed her purse, and we headed to Kwik Star to pick out our treats.

Upon arriving home all the kids had to clean their rooms before breakfast. While they were doing that I was able to get a breakfast casserole made. I wanted to ballance out the sugar a bit. Marlene was thrilled my choice for breakfast, it's her "favorite"! (along with a myriad of other things)

The room cleaning was finally accomplishe and we sang our first "Happy Birthday" of the day. She made her own crown at VBS last week.

After breakfast and devotions we had a bunch of house work to do. All pitched in pretty well, except for Homer who was asleep again. The girls folded and distributed a couple of loads of laundry while I finished cleaning the berries I'd picked Saturday and cleaning the kitchen. Jon took care of the garbage and Jesse was the "runner". He took things different places I needed them to go.

After a messy lunch of peanut butter and syrup sandwiches, thanks so much for that Aunt Jessica, we loaded up some tubs and headed out to "The Property". We did a little cleaning up inside the house and dropped off some tubs of winter clothes and Christmas decorations. Don said there is one room availible for me to start storing stuff in. I am trying to get things here weeded out, especially in the basement, so I can do some deep cleaning.

We had a small amount of berries to pick in the after noon. It was my last time, YEAH!!!! Then we were off to the pool! Upon our arrival home, it was time to check the mail. Our kids LOVE mail call during birthday season! Marlene has received many cards and gifts of $. Thanks to all who have helped make her day special!

Marlene's supper request was Mac and Cheese. How easy is that!!! After supper we heade to the local $1 theater to see "Prince Caspian". It was a good movie, but it lasted 2 1/2 hours!! We couldn't believe how late it was when we got out!! We had a great talk with the kids about lessons the characters learned on the way home. All of the lessons were important for each of us on a daily basis. There were some quite intense battle scenes and the kids were all afraid of nightmares, but they were all asleep within 5 minutes of bedtime prayers.

As usual Marlene made her own cake.

Of course THIS is the best part!

We sang "Happy Birthday" to Marlene with daddy home after supper. Because of time constraints we were only able to take one bit each of the cake before we needed to leave. I think I'll let them have the cake for breakfast.

Dearest Marlene,

Baby, you are such a special gift to our family! Your love and sensitivity to the needs of others is only one of the many precious qualities we cherish about you.

We are so very pleased to see you able to stand alone when needed. You do such a terrific job of including any and everyone in the things you choose to do.

I am trying to let you be your own person. You obviously got your father's taste, or lack of, in all things fashionable. Your obvious comfort in making your own choices is something I could definately learn from. I am glad you are now telling me you wont wear something BEFORE I take the tags off and wash it!! Thank you for defering to me and giving up wearing socks with sandles :-) You did a great job in picking out a purse! I love it!

I am so thankful for your daddy and his attentiveness to your needs. It is hard for him to understand girls in general, but you mean the world to him, and he wants you to always know the love you deserve as God's Princess. I'll never forget how in your newborn pictures he kept you "covered". His fierce desire to protect you and keep you safe is not just an idea, it's a part of his everyday life.

We are forever thankful to our heavenly Father for the gift of Jesus and the gift of you!

All my love,

Marlene Anne June 23,2000 7#12oz

(Sorry folks! I don't have a scanner!)

Friday, June 20, 2008

A Few Firsts

I have a few "firsts" of summer to share:

First sunburn

My first sunburn came in the form of a small "smile shaped" area just above my waist in the small of my back. I greased myself down with sunscreen before I picked berries for 2 1/2 hours Tuesday, but I failed to realize my tank top hiked up a bit. It still smarts when I my clothes rub on it. Don thinks it's great fun to hear me squeak when he sprays the aloe gel on it :-)

First swim

Last night I took the kids to the pool for the first time this summer. I had to pick strawberries, AGAIN, but promised the kids we'd go after I got done. We were there from 8-8:30pm.
We went again to day from 1-4pm. It was great to be in the water. Jesse and Lexi, our future neighbor, kept me busy at the end of the water slide.
The pool didn't open until last Friday (13th), but that is a whole nother story in itself! You would think people would be used to June coming after May and have the pool prep done!

First tooth lost

Tonight at supper Jon complained his loose tooth hurt when he ate. We've been so busy the past week, and they were gone for 3 days, so I hadn't checked it in a while. It was barely hanging on. Jon complained about the hole where his tooth used to be. He wanted me to tape it!

2nd tooth lost

A sum total of 15" later we were checking his other front tooth and it too came out!

First Strawberry Pie!

It took forever to get the berries, but I finally had time to put together a fresh strawberry pie. The recipe is compliments of my MIL. It's been a favorite for some time! Delphia was a big help! She did all the stirring, which takes upwards of 20". Gotta love the swim skirt over the PJ shorts!

Night home with Dad

Tonight for the first time in awhile, the kids were able to have supper with and hang out with their dad. It was nice to have him home relaxing with us! We are headed to bed soon. We hope to get a decent nights sleep so we can get rested up a bit for all we hope to get done tomorrow.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The Property

We arrived safely home at 9:10 PM Sunday night. The route was easy, but I was WAY tired! Once we were in Iowa I woke up and the time went quickly. Note to self: Next time you decide to take the Camry to save on gas, limit the load to 3 kids instead of 4. They were about to kill each other the whole way home. I in turn wished teleportation was available!

After a short family time Sunday night, Don and Homer had roasted hot dogs for the kids so I didn't have to stop and get food plus try to deal with the limited space for eating, we hit the hay! No tornado warnings! Yeah!

Monday morning found our alarm going off at it's usual ungodly hour, 5:45. I had to get Don and Homer out the door by 6:50. Don met my Dad to get Homer his ride to Jr. Boys camp. I can't believe my baby is going into 4th grade! He is having a good time so far. I am glad my sister, 3 brothers, and my dad are all up there! Here he is ready to roll! He said he missed me VERY much while I was gone, but he declined my offer to stay home from camp:-)

Once I had Don and Homer out the door, I had to wake the other 4. We needed to leave by 8, so they needed to get breakfast and I had some MORE packing to do! We got out of the house almost on time and made it to my folks church where they are having VBS this week. My dear mother is keeping the kids until Thursday!

So, what does one do with 3 DAYS all to ones self? I have no idea! I keep asking myself! Monday I stopped by my brother's new house and helped my sister in law, Jessica, paint their master bed room. After that I took a walk with my Mom, Marlene, and Jon. I left town in time to pick up Don at work. We had a stop to make, then we went out for supper. We crashed HARD when we got home! The pace of our life and all we have to do wears us out quite a bit! It was super nice to just chill out together with No Interruptions!!!

Yesterday, I stayed in bed until noon and watched a couple of movies. I was so torn! I had tons to do cleaning wise, but I can do that while the kids are here. Sleeping in is not so easily attained! For some crazy reason, I agreed to pick strawberries for a friend while she was on an Alaskan cruise. I pick them and clean them and I get to keep half. It seemed like a do able deal..... Honestly, the patch doesn't look that big, but there are no rows and the leaves do a great job of hiding the berries. I spent 3 1/2 hours yesterday picking and cleaning those buggers! And I don't even have my half cleaned! I think part of the problem is the berries are quite mushy and thus not real tasty. It lessons the motivation to pick them when they aren't worth the trouble! I'm going to have to get some Shure Jell and make jam! I want to make a yummy strawberry pie, but I spend so much time getting the berries I have no time to do anything with them! (2nd note to self: I hate gardening, thus I have no garden, don't offer to help garden unless your the last available sole on the planet!)

Last night Don and I went to our property and did some work in the basement. It was kinda mucky and I got quite dirty, but I was thankful I was getting that dirty in an unfinished basement. I know some whose basement is that muddy from the flooding and theirs is finished!

This morning I did get up at a decent time and cleaned my kitchen and part of the dining room, paid bills and balanced the check book (depressing). Today Don took 1/2 day off. We walked hand in hand thru a couple of home improvement stores checking prices and picking out retaining blocks for our egress window. We had the shock of our lives when the color I picked was the same color Don was thinking, PLUS I didn't pick out the priciest blocks available!!! Our agreeing with out "discussion" plus the moderate pricing was our miracle for the day! We are now home, getting ready to head back out to the house.

I honestly hadn't planned on getting this wordy! The below picture is of some daisies the "strawberry friend" gave me last spring. I love the fact that they grew even taller than our weeds with NO tending! We did have to water them a bit after we planted them last spring, but that has been it! Don has been careful to shield them from the onslaught of large vehicles and lumber deliveries. Last spring after we planted them I called the property "Daisy Lane". Don wasn't real thrilled with that so we are back to calling it "The Property".

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Which Way Should I Go!

Currently I am sitting in Michigan, watching The Princess Bride, and trying to plan my route back to Iowa.

We, Marlene, Jon, Delphia, Jesse and I, headed out here Thursday morning. Mainly we are out here for a graduation open house, but we have also fit in quick trips to visit family, and we plan to visit our church family in Marne for the morning service tomorrow.

I have been up rather late each night, but it sure has been nice to not worry about tornadoes!!

I have been making the trip to and from Iowa to Michigan for almost 10 years now, the route is pretty much a now brainer, BUT with all the water I had to find an alternative. I'll survive. For awhile I thought I80 was closed over the Mississippi, THAT would have made things MUCH more complicated!! I was VERY relieved to find out I could travel the "normal route" at least until I am in Iowa.

Homer is home getting ready for Jr. Boys camp and taking care of Don. Yesterday he took some food out of the microwave Don had been warming and took it to him at the table. Don was surprised, but told him thanks. Homers reply; "I figured I'd take care of you since mom isn't here." Too cute!

As far as the windows go, Don and Marc were able to get all the windows and one of the patio doors in Tuesday night.

I have been so glad to be out here in MI again, and see every one. But I ache to be home again in Don's arms. With him so busy getting the house ready, we haven't seen much of each other much lately. My mom is planning to have the kids at her house Mon-Wed. I am soooo excited. Our time will be spent at the house, but at least we will be able to BOTH be there!

I'm a tad tired and rambling. Good night!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008


I was awakened at 10:30 pm last night by my cell phone. Don had called to tell me, "I found it!" I was quite confused until he explained further, "I found the last nail for getting the roof shingled!" It is/was a relief to him to have that project completely buttoned up! He had only the ridge vent to install last night and with the help of our friend Michael, he got it done!

Today Don took 1/2 the day off, and he and my brother Marc tackled the windows on the main level.
This is the view outside our bedroom on the NW corner of the house.
This is the inside!

It has been our experience that each phase of this building project takes longer than anticipated. Both Don and I were pleasantly surprised to find the windows going in VERY well. They may even get all the main level windows in by the end of the evening. If possible they will install the patio doors as well, but we'll see how it goes. I guess Michael was going to show up again tonight, so there will be plenty of man power there!

In order to get the patio doors in they need to tear down the scaffolding, move it to the back of the house and set it up again. Marc let me know, in so many words, he didn't care for my choice in patio doors. They are VERY heavy!!! I don't know that another door would have been lighter, but we sure are thankful for all those willing to lend their muscles to accomplish this feat!
It may be hard to see, but it is beautiful!!!

When I took supper to Marc and Don, at 6pm, they had installed 9 of the 15 windows. (This # excludes the 2 patio doors) At this point the biggest challenge seems to be finding a firm footing for the ladder 15 feet down from where the window is being installed! Marc was working on the outside, Don on the inside. When I saw how Marc had to push the ladder away from the outside of the house and hang from the roof while Don was maneuvering the window unit thru the hole I decided to leave. Thankfully they only had 4 more windows to do so far off the ground, and 3 of them are all in one spot!

Once all the windows on the main floor are in place we will be able to keep the upstairs dry. We are waiting to install the lower level windows until the floor has been poured down there. Don needs to install plumbing and the in floor heat before we can have the concrete poured.
This is the NE corner of the house.
(Don started removing the roof jacks tonight)

This is the window in the "office".
The wood for the windows was all finished before they were put together. I wasn't 100% happy with how my choice of color for the pole barn turned out, and it made me a little gun shy about making other choices pertaining to the house. I am ABSOLUTELY THRILLED with the divided lights,wood grain, stain, and hardware on the windows! (All decisions I made over 2 months ago)

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Tornado Warnings, Comfort Food, and the River.....In Our Basement

This is how one spends the afternoon when 3 out of 4 of the past nights have been spent under tornado warnings 2 weeks after an EF5 ripped thru 2 neighboring towns.

This is how the river FLOWS (from 2directions) thru the basement of old farmhouses when the thunderstorms producing the tornado warnings ALSO produce heavy, driving rains 4 nights in a row, and all morning.

This is the PERFECT comfort food for just such occasions.

(pancakes, strawberries, cool whip and chocolate syrup)

This is the look of a meal enjoyed by all and rejected by none! Thank you God! I couldn't handle a "meal battle" right now!

These are also 3 of the 5 precious ones I fear letting down by not realizing danger in time to get them to safety.

I am not sure whether to delve any deeper into any of this or not! I am afraid I may exceed blog post guidelines!

We are SO tired! I am glad I have not seen first hand the devastation caused by the tornado that tore thru exactly 2 weeks ago!

I am beginning to wonder if I should have watched the video clips from 2 bank cameras! One was outside and caught the destruction of a home across the street and also visible is the affect of the tornado on the surrounding trees. The second clip was from a camera inside the bank and it shows the results inside a building.

These images are rather disturbing at 0 dark 30, on the 2nd floor of a farmhouse, during a thunderstorm with the likely hood of producing tornadoes!

After repeating this 3 out of 4 nights I am reduced to a whimpering pile of nerves!

I am not one to borrow trouble, but I also hold a GREATLY EXPANDED respect for tornadoes.

Some may not know it, but I spent the better half of my growing-up-years as a resident of Corn Country. Thru the years there have been many tornado warning, but 2 weeks ago was the first time I remember one ever setting down anywhere other than a field.

I was actually glad to find a house to rent outside of town because we wouldn't be bothered by those pesky warning sirens. Now I just wish I could go to sleep knowing I would hear one if needed. Even the people living in the nearest town don't all hear the siren if it goes off! We don't stand a chance 1 1/2 miles away, especially with 70MPH winds!

So, we have a weather radio. This is better than nothing, but it went off 6 times Tuesday night, 2-3 times Wednesday night, and another 4 times last night. Most of the alarms were for flash flood warnings!

Don got so used to turning it off, he did it in his sleep and didn't even look to see what the alarm was for. I wasn't asleep, trust me, so I woke him up and he checked.

We did end up going down to the basement for 45"early Thursday AM. The kids were THRILLED by this, NOT!

Our kids are hard sleepers like their dad. This is a blessing in that every one, except me, sleeps thru even the worst of thunderstorms. This is a problem when I need to get them moving in the middle of the night!

I woke Marlene up first, she sleeps the hardest. We had the other four headed to the basement, before she was even functioning. Oh, she was on her feet, but not cognizant.

I think the cold water on everyones bare feet helped wake them up, but it also made us all miserable! "Mom, I have to pee REALLY bad." "Mom, I'm cold!" "Mom, my blanket dropped in the water and is wet." "Mom, where am I supposed to sit?" "Mom, we're not supposed to be close to windows." "Dear, do you have any AA and AAA batteries?" "Mom, I don't want to get under the desk if a tornado comes, the floor is wet." "Mom, I have to pee too!"

All this while listening to the weather radio drone on about "strong winds capable of producing tornadoes" not only in our area, but also 35 miles where my parents, 5 younger siblings, and 1grown brother and his family live.

I tell you! my mind was going 100 miles a minute! "Should I call my brother, and parents?" "Marc lives in a trailer, they need to seek shelter!" "Do grandpa and grandma know?" "Wish I had all our digital pictures in one place so I could grab them!" "No one has shoes." "At least the other tornado came during the day, so people could see it! All I can see is trees moving like they were made of rubber, kind of like the video....." "Oh! I hate this basement!" "Being down here is going to do wonders for my allergies!" "God, PLEASE PROTECT MY BABIES!"

Last night again found us in the middle of a "Severe thunderstorm capable of producing tornadoes". "Seek shelter on the lowest level of your dwelling away from windows...."

As I put the kids to bed,I prayed God would calm the storm. He did, temporarily, but 20" later I was moving all the kids to the ground level of our house.

The boys were assigned to the couches, and the girls got the bed in the extra room. Don and I settled in upstairs, but ended up hauling our bedding and the weather radios to the living room floor.

Our weather radio got dropped at the end of our stint in the basement Thursday AM. It still makes all kinds of crazy noise when there is a warning, but the radio part no longer works. Thankfully our dear brother Joe bought us walkie talkies awhile back that pick up the weather station!

We were able to move back to our bed after the warning expired at 2:30 this morning. We got every one around for church in record time, less than an hour. Yes, we looked a little worse the wear, but so did every one else in the congregation!

The rain has stopped, but the wind is still rather stiff. The flooding is not expected to recede until Thursday. I am glad God is in control! I pray for a reprieve tonight!

P.S. Yes, I know I spell through wrong. My appologies to those who care.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Footprints Poem Visual

The following was sent to me by a friend. I was encouraged as I thought of God the Father and the enabling He does on my behalf every day.

"A son asked his father, 'Dad, will you take part in a marathon with me?'The father who, despite having a heart condition, says 'Yes'. They went on to complete the marathon together.
Father and son went on to joinother marathons, the father always saying 'Yes' to his son's request of going through the race together.
One day, the son asked his father,'Dad, let's join the Ironman together.' To which, his father said 'Yes'.
For those who don't know, Ironman is the toughest triathlon ever. The race encompasses three endurance events of a 2.4 mile (3.86 kilometer)ocean swim, followed by a 112 mile (180 .2 kilometer) bike ride, andending with a 26.2 mile (42.195 kilometer) marathon along the coast ofthe Big Island. Father and son went on to complete the race together."
(The son works at B.U. in the technology department.)

School's Out!!!

Finally! We are done with school for the 07-08 school year!!!

I tried to find the picture I took the kids first day of school, but I was unsuccessful. I saw a copy of it recently and was amazed at the difference in 10 months!

Here are the pictures I took today.

Special thanks to:
Mr. Danielson - Bus driver

Mrs. Boike - Homer's 3rd grade teacher

Mrs. Albaugh- Marlene's 2nd grade teacher

(she will have Jon next year. Boy is she in for a surprise!)

Mrs. Kjormoe -Student teacher last fall and substitute teacher this past month

Mrs. Grandon - 1st grade teacher

Mrs. Decker - Teacher's helper

(there were 23 in the class!)

I've been kinda worried about the end of school coinciding with my "cycle", but I cannot describe the feeling of relief I experienced as we exited the school! My family and my schedule are once again mine only!!!

This afternoon has gone well. We sorted thru all the supplies that came home and there are even some to be saved for next year! I am VERY pleased to have the backpacks put away. I didn't enjoy having them as a fixture in the dining room!

The pool is supposed to open tomorrow! I bought our pool pass and set up lessons for the kids yesterday.

We are counting down the days until we go to Michigan (June 13th), Homer goes to Jr. Boys camp for the first time (June 16th), Marlene's birthday (June 23rd), the other 5 summer birthdays (6/30, 7/1, 7/7, 7/14, 7/21), VBS, Etc....

DELPHIA ON THE OTHER HAND, has counted down the days until school starts again, 74! She can't wait to start Kindergarten!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008


EVERY TIME!!!! Every time I enter the title to a blog, I hit "ENTER" to drop down to the "body" of the blog. Many of you may already know what I am trying to pound into my bloggin' brain, hitting enter publishes the post, or more accurately in my case, the lack of a post.
So to all who get e-mail alerts when someone publishes a new post, but find nothing new when you check my blog, sorry!

Before I errantly hit the "Enter" key I was pondering a rather morose train of thought. I feel stuck.

No, I am not about to go off the deep end. My marriage is great and I have NO desire out of that. It's just..... I am tired of doing the same things over and over again, even if they are the right things to do.

We recently listened to a missionary Dr. give a presentation on his ministry. He spoke about all the kid he treats in.... I don't remember where, with worms. The classic symptoms are being listless, CHECK, bloated stomach, CHECK, lack of appetite, not so much. Rats, I guess I can't blame worms, I'll go for PMS!

There are a number of factors adding up to make me feel cagey. (FYI: Cagey is my term for feeling in a cage and wanting out. I am not sure how grammatically correct it is, but it's mine)

Back to my factors. Our house is coming along nicely, but the more we accomplish the more I ache to actually LIVE there!

Any time things are being accomplished at our property, Don is there. When Don is there he is not here. Again, I am thrilled and very willing to sacrifice in order to finish the house, but he remains my best bud, and we don't get to talk much for now.

Yes, I know I can work with him, and I do when I can, but that often falls squarely into the "Doing the right thing" category. My desire is to be with him, but many times I benefit him most by accomplishing other tasks here at home, both his and mine.

Which leads me to where we live now: There is STILL water in the basement. The water has been there since February. Actually, there is wall to wall water today due to the replacement of the water holding tank. There are actually 2 of them in the system. Both had to be drained to replace the one that supposedly had the problem. Result: BUNCHES OF WATER!

Also, I ALWAYS have cleaning and laundry to do. There's always that...

I am trying to ease back into exercise, but I am a far cry from 1/2 hour 5-6 days a week.

I am trying (again)to effect a change on my weight, but after 10 days, my weight is the same. Now I just feel hungry and tired all the time.

My allergies are worse than they have ever been. I am having to take a daily prescription on top of my allergy shot every 3 months.

Due to allergies, I am assuming, my eyes feel terrible and I haven't been able to comfortably wear my contacts for almost a month now. I am "stuck" in glasses.

Forgive my moping. Thanks for lending an "ear". Like I said, I know the right things to do, I am just busy right now fighting caving into out and out selfishness.
I want my way, NOW! You know, stuff like that!

Well, off to prayer meeting! At least I get to sit my my boyfriend!

God bless you all for your patience! I knew you would understand!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Mission Accomplished!

As of 1 AM this morning our roof is fully shingled!! The ridge vent still needs to be done, but the roof no longer leaks!


Monday, June 2, 2008


(For Your Information)
I went to my Dr. Wednesday because I had a sinus infection. He put me on antibiotics, and some allergy meds, but this thing kicked in full force Thursday and Friday.

Since then I have pretty much just laid around putting pressure on the right side of my face. It was terrible!

Today for the first time, I am feeling up to doing things, and I am not taking regular doses of pain meds. I have plenty of work piled up from the 4 days on the couch.

The shingles on our roof are closer to being done thanks to Don's long hours, and help from my brothers, and our pastor.

The kids should finally be done with school Thursday! I can't wait for them to be home, but it will take some doing to get them all settled back into how things go around here.

Don's 3 year anniversary for work was Saturday. He now has vacation days again! He and my brother Marc are supposed to work on the roof today. We'll see what the 44% chance of rain does!

We are very excited my other brother Stephen and his family will be moving nearby this summer. It is very hard for them to leave the church they are in, but they know God is leading them to this new church. Please pray for all effected by this transition.

I am off to order exterior doors!